Nurturing the Nest: How Working on Yourself Can Help Your Kids Thrive

If your child is being bullied or has started bullying others at school, it might feel like your world is falling apart. You might not know where to start or what to do to help them. But here’s a thought that might surprise you: the best place to start is with yourself.

When I was at my lowest point, the idea of sitting down with a psychologist or counselor felt daunting. I didn’t want to be told what I should be doing or be put into a box with a label on it. I needed something different, so I turned to coaching. Coaches don’t tell you who to be; they help you find out who you are. That approach changed my life.

But the biggest change wasn’t just in me—it was in my kids. I noticed that as I grew and healed, they started to change too. They got along better, their grades went up, and they seemed genuinely happier. It was like a ripple effect, and I wasn’t the only one who noticed. Friends, teachers, even the parents of their friends commented on the difference. It was like we’d all taken a deep breath and let out a sigh of relief.

This isn’t just my story. I’ve seen it happen with so many of the people I work with. They come to me stressed and overwhelmed, worried about their kids. And once they start focusing on themselves—really working on their own growth and healing—they see the same kinds of changes in their families.

The key is connection. Our kids don’t need us to be perfect, but they do need to feel connected to us. They need to know that we see them, hear them, and love them just as they are. Sometimes, they’d rather have the wrong kind of connection (like being yelled at) than no connection at all. They’re desperate to feel close to us, even if it means negative attention.

So, what can you do? Start by looking inward. Work on understanding yourself, your triggers, and your reactions. When you do this, you create a space for your kids to be themselves—without fear of losing that connection with you. And in that space, amazing things can happen.

Ready to Build a Stronger Connection?

If you’re ready to create a deeper, more meaningful connection with your kids, consider coaching. It’s not about fixing you—it’s about finding you. When you show up as your true, authentic self, it opens the door for your kids to do the same. And that’s where real change begins.